Good money management is much more than an Excel spreadsheet . How we organize our finances is often a reflection of our upbringing and our relationship to ourselves . By working on our financial well-being, we take care of ourselves for the long term. Yes, financial education is self-care! In this article, we have chosen to focus on the attachment theory to put some love back into our relationship with money.

Small disclaimer before you start reading: this article and all the advice on the blog are intended to be educational, and do not constitute financial advice. You must take your personal situation into account and to define an appropriate investment strategy, you must call on a specialist adviser.

What is Attachment Theory?

Deployed by John Bowlby at the end of the 1960s, established a strong link between the quality of an individual's first relationships , in particular with their parents, and the way in which they will develop their future relationships.

She suggests that childhood emotional attachment greatly influences relationships in adulthood . If you were wondering why you always end up with the same partner profile, this theory will probably explain it more than your astro chart. ♊

To support this hypothesis, Bowlby studied the behavior of children placed in the countryside during the Second World War.

Today, this theory initially developed in the context of human relations can be transferred to our relationship to other areas. At Puissant, we want to apply it to the relationship with money.

Bowlby's theory describes three types of insecure attachment , we detail them in the next paragraph. 🫰

The different types of attachments

Anxious attachment

People with an anxious attachment usually have difficulty establishing stable interpersonal relationships. They are often preoccupied with rejection and loss in their relationships, which is why they constantly seek approval and reassurance from others. ❤️

On the money side, we are on a cicada profile . Inability to save, debt, people with anxious attachment frequently make financial decisions that are not in their best interests.

We think of a crack at his favorite brand or not to put a budget limit on vacation. This profile tends to avoid looking at her bank account because she is afraid of what might be there. It therefore has no overview of incoming and outgoing flows and chooses to live in denial.

Talking about budgets, investing, and even financial education is stressful. Taking the first step with a clear and easy-to-use financial tracker can help you gradually regain control over your finances. 💵

In this article, we share our best tips for better managing your money.

Ambivalent attachment

Anxious attachment could be summed up by the idea that no one can be trusted . This belief translates into the perception of money as something "dirty", "evil" on which one cannot count.

A person who has experienced this type of attachment needs control over his environment to feel safe. 🔐

This can manifest itself in a tendency not to take financial risks, to avoid investments and to prefer to keep everything under your mattress without having fun or making your money grow. He's our ant on steroids. 🐜

To move towards a healthier relationship with your money, you can work on alleviating the excessive restriction by setting a realistic budget and learning to indulge yourself with reasonable purchases. An extra chocolate bar in your basket or a restaurant with friends is not a threat to the health of your finances. I promise !

Disorganized attachment

The last style of attachment is a kind of insecure mutant which brings together the bad habits of the cicada and the ant. There are contradictory and incoherent behaviors . They are, for example, hot-cold pros in their relationships.

When it comes to money, they may have difficulty managing their money consistently and making informed financial decisions. Impulsive behavior in terms of spending or financial investments, taking reckless risks as if tomorrow did not exist are also linked to this style.

People with a disorganized attachment often need to move on independently . Learning basic financial skills can help fill these gaps and build healthier financial behaviors. Online courses, books and workshops on money management will be great resources to improve your financial education and regain power over your wallet. 💪


By working on your emotional attachment , it is possible to develop a healthier relationship with money. Let's not forget that each case is unique and that attachment styles are by no means a fixed or permanent characteristic of the personality. Managing your wallet well is one of the many components of fulfillment. To discover other everyday self-care practices , it's here! 😘

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